There's no place like home...there's no place

Like home.

Our bags are packed, I get off at 1, and in less than 24 hours we will be back in KS. Emily is SOOO excited she tells me repeatedly. Bret and I are weary just thinking of the drive ahead of us but we too are excited to see family and friends and have a long vacation.

Every road trip back to KS we get the kids a new DVD to start the trip off with. This year we got Tinker Bell and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Both the kids love CCBB (yes I let them watch it last night as I needed a moments peace to frantically get everything packed, one last load of laundry done, and the house at least picked up). I wasn't surprised since they LOVE Mary Poppins. The singing, dancing, and silliness are just as captivating to my children as they were to us as kids.

In addition to seeing our family and friends there are couple of places that we HAVE to eat at while at home as well. Would you believe that KS has way more places to eat (albeit mostly chains) than Berks county here in PA. Top two places that are MUST when home is 1) The Pad and 2) Old Chicago's...YUMMM!!! KANSAS here we come!!

Lists, lists, lists

As we continue to prepare for our big adventure road trip (from hell) back to KS I keep adding more things to my many lists than I seem to be checking off.

I have a what to pack, what to buy, and of course a what needs to be done list. Bret also has a list but for someone reason his is not nearly as big and long as mine. I am slowly making plans on who we are going to see and when and most importantly where we are going to stay. My head starts to spin when I think about all of the family and friends we will see in such a short time not to mention how many different places we plan to stay at. In the end it will be a trip that goes by all too quickly with not enough time spent with everyone.

I was talking to Kyla on the phone the other day and she too was stressed about her lists of things to do/remember. I remember oh so well how long that list was before my wedding day. The errands that have to be ran, the last minute projects to work on, and the details you left to be done as the day grew nearer.

My daughter is beside herself with excitement with our upcoming trip. She too feels homesick for our family (specifically grandparents) and can't wait to see them all. She has been hosting a count down that everyone she sees gets an update on. Emily to has a list of things that she does before we head for KS on our incredibly long road trip. So for your enjoyment here are the things that I interpret as Emily's list of things to get done before heading to KS.

Things to pack in my travel Dora backpack:

1. baby (this is her lovey from when she was a newborn that she sleeps with)
2. Go Fish cards
3. snacks
4. gum
5. books
6. swim suit (not kidding I found this in her back pack when I was looking to pack it for her)
7. toys to play with in the truck on the way
8. favorite movie (even though mom packs a ton of DVD's to watch and we get a new one for the trip)
9. my camera so I can take pictures of my Kyla in her pretty dress

Things to do before I leave:
1. Ask everyone I see to make sure they would be willing to come feed/water/and play with Lulu (our bunny) while I am gone
2. Make sure my teacher and friends know that I will not be at school because I am going to be in KS
3. Call grandma and Lita to make sure that they know we are coming to KS
4. Pack my Dora bag and help Palmer pack his back pack too
5. Remind mom 1093485109238 times to not forget my Dora back pack

Ah if only my lists were still so simple. Instead I get a look of wonderment from my husband last night as he once again thought how amazing I am for getting it all done. The house is currently in shambles and we are less than 80% packed. By tomorrow at 1pm when we both get off work by an act of Mama Incredible everything will be ready to go and perfect. Quick say a prayer!

The day you say I DO

The whole reason we are venturing back to the flat state (aka KS) besides to see family and friends is to celebrate Bret's sister's wedding. We are so happy for Kyla and Lucas and are thrilled to be a part of their special day.

It's hard for me to believe that just a week after they get married Bret and I will have been married for 6 years. Without a doubt my wedding day was one of the happiest days of my life. So in true SIL fashion, here are my tips for making sure that you have the best wedding day ever.

1. Don't sweat the small stuff. Everyone tells you that something will inevitably go wrong on your wedding day. You have a choice to make...let it go or let it bother you. On the morning of the wedding day we found out that a couple of the bridesmaid dresses didn't fit...at all. We had them made and the lady making them decided to let them out just a little...a little too much. I remember asking my BF Tracey what was wrong with the dresses (since everyone stopped talking and the room got very still when I came into the room). In true Tracey fashion (aka with nothing on underneath) she let go of the top of her dress and it dropped to the floor (strapless of course). So we sewed the dresses to the top of their bras (those that were wearing them) and made a makeshift corset in the back. Luckily I have very talented aunts who could sew like the devil and we had wraps to cover it up anyways. Problem solved. When I found this out I could have made a big deal out of it and gotten really upset. Instead I didn't care...I have family and friends that can worry about this. Let your family and friends worry about everything. The most you should worry about is not getting any lipstick on your dress (at least until after pictures). Everything will work itself out and you don't want to look back on how much time you spent stressing over something that didn't really matter anyways.

2. Make it your day. My sister wasn't crazy about the way her hair ended up and she didn't like the pictures/poses that the photographer was taking. One bride didn't like her make up. She didn't normally wear a lot of makeup but her mom insisted for the pictures to have a lot put on. If you don't feel pretty or you don't like something...politely speak your mind. This is YOUR day and all that matters is if you like it. Trust me people have seen bridezillas and on your worst day you are not this. You want to look back and feel beautiful and you are the one that is going to have to live with this day forever. If something is not right...tell me as I have no problems being the bitch :)

3. Remember to take a minute for you and Lucas. The day will be a blur. You will be hugged a million times, dance your butt off, and have a million people wanting your attention at once. Remember that even if it is just a moment to take the time to privately relish in your celebration with your husband. Sometimes that day felt so busy that Bret and I had barely a second for each other. We had one moment that I will never forget where we took just a second longer before going in to cut the cake after taking pictures outside where we just talked for a second. He told me how pretty I looked, we laughed about something that happened, and we took just a second to privately celebrate that we were married and so blessed.

That's it! I don't have to tell you to have a good time cause I know you will. Marriage is one of God's greatest blessings and we are so glad that you and Lucas found each other. It will be here before you know it and then you are going to be looking back two (or more lol) kids later and wondering where the time went. We love you!!

Count Down

We leave for Kansas in two days. TWO DAYS!!!! I have nothing packed. NOTHING!!!

OK enough freaking out. The good news is that my laundry is done with the exception of one last load before we leave town. We will gone for 10 days and couldn't be more excited about (well, except the driving part). I will be the first to admit that I have totally slacked off in the "get ready to head back to KS" department. This past weekend both Bret and I worked a day each and by Monday we just wanted to relax a little. Last night I had intentions of getting some serious work done and that went right out the window when Bret asked the kids if they wanted to go to The Works ( a great place to eat similar to Chuckie Cheese except for adults and awesome food). We got home got the kids ready and into bed and I planned once again to start getting some things ready when my friend called and asked if I wanted to go running with her.

It was only 9pm..why not? I have this thing about not saying no when someone asks me to workout with them. The guilt is way to much so I just do it and afterwards I am usually pretty glad. Needless to say after I got back there was no way I was going to get anything done besides go to bed.

Tonight is the night (or maybe tomorrow cause you know I tend to procrastinate until the last minute). I have made my lists and am ready to get the ball rolling. My hope is to have everything packed tonight except the last minute things that I can't pack until the day we leave. Then tomorrow I plan to clean the house. There is nothing better than coming home to a CLEAN house after being out of town.

Don't worry just cause we are going back to KS for the week doesn't mean I won't still be posting. It is Kansas people...not Disney World so we will have some free time. Besides what else am I going to do for 35 hours of driving/riding in the car?

The "D" word

Divorce is an ugly thing. I have never been divorced but the stories that I have heard and the divorces that I have witnessed have never been simple or easy. I am not sure if it is simply the logistics of it all or the emotions that are connected to those logistics that make it so complicated and painful.

To me when you get a divorce you lay everything out. This is everything "we own" and everything "we owe". You pay off what you owe and split what's left over. Hopefully you can split what you don't sell and then split what you do. It never seems to work this way. One party or the other or even both tips that balance and makes it grey instead of black and white. This may be an affair, spending sprees, or a feeling of greater entitlement. I don't pretend to know.

I am not sure if it is because of the arguments we have witnessed over our lifetime from our parents about money or if it is because we have never really had any to argue about but money is the one thing we never get into fights about. With no second thoughts in my mind I can say that money is the #1 reason my parents are getting a divorce. I can also say that I have seen many other couple's constantly fight over money to the point of either divorce/separation/or constant arguments.

So it is not surprising that even though my parents filed for divorce almost a year ago it is still no where near being settled. They have been married for 29 years and somethings never change. I am furious with one parent and heart broken for the other. I am frustrated that both of them seem to be stuck in one place and unable to move forward. I decided from the beginning to stay out of it and not get involved but it is impossibly hard to see so much money on attorney fees being tossed out of the window for the same argument that has been raging my entire life. I don't understand how they can not understand what is so clear to everyone else. I have always been able to see both sides but neither can understand each other. It's almost as though they speak different languages now. I have given it a year with NO PROGRESS. I am losing my resolve on staying uninvolved. I know that I should not choose sides but I feel as if that option was taken away from me. I am very hurt and angry at one parent. I wish it would all go away so that everyone can start to heal.

Mindfulness

I have a friend who blogs a lot about mindfulness. In fact she refers to her therapist as Goddess of Mindfulness. From Wikipedia:

Mindfulness is a mental state, characterized by calm awareness of one's body functions, feelings, content of consciousness, or consciousness itself are occuring within mind. Mindfulness (Pali: Sati; Sanskrit: smṛti स्मृति) plays a central role in the teaching of the Buddha where it is affirmed that "correct" or "right" mindfulness (Pali:sammā-sati; Sanskrit samyak-smṛti) is the critical factor in the path to liberation and subsequent enlightenment. It is the seventh element of the Noble Eightfold Path, the practice of which supports analysis resulting in the development of wisdom (Sanskrit: prajñā). The Satipatthana Sutta is one of the foremost early texts dealing with mindfulness. A key innovative teaching of the Buddha was that meditative absorption should be combined with the practice of mindfulness.[1] For more on the concept in early Buddhism, see sati and sampajanna.
Mindfulness techniques are increasingly being employed in Western psychology to help alleviate a variety of mental and physical conditions: see Mindfulness (psychology).

Sometimes I feel like my thoughts are flying at a million miles per hour. I have so many things that I am thinking/worrying about at all times that things that are really important to my "calmness" has been pushed aside. I use this blog sometimes to clear, prioritize, and sort those thoughts. Here are some of the efforts that I plan to try and be more mindful of in my life.

1. Drink more water. It is amazing what staying hydrated can do for you. Dr. Heskett tells me that if I drank more water I would have less headaches, would be less tired and have more energy, and would be hungry less (which could potentially help curb my weight gain). These are all very good things and it is such a simple act. Drink more water. The problem is that I don't really like water unless I am really thirsty. Solution...Crystal Light individual packets...yeah!

2. More patience with the kids. It is so hard in the moment to practice patience. Stress that we are running late or that I am tired at the end of the day causes my patience to ware thin. I want to try and stay more positive and let the small things go more easily. Emily got gum in the carpet or Palmer spilt his milk...it's ok both will clean up there is no reason to get so upset. Sometimes I think I send the kids to timeout more for me than them. They already feel bad but I need that time to recollect and cool off before I start yelling. I'm not mad "at them" I am frustrated at the situation. I need to remember their ages and to make my expectations match those. I have great kids and I know that sometimes I set my expectations years beyond their actual ages and I need be more mindful of that.

3. Stay positive about work. I don't love my job...I don't hate my job either. I am not challenged and feel under utilized. Maybe this is my challenge. To work independently to better my skills and abilities even though the expectations are not there. I have never been very good at self motivating. I have always worked well under pressure and deadlines. People depending on me makes me work better and harder. Maybe my focus needs to be on how to better my ability to find things to do that I am not asked/expected to do.

4. Focus on myself more. I spend a lot of time focusing on Bret and the kids. I work to support their school, their interests, their skills, and their passions. By coincidence I have stopped focusing on mine. I don't know what my goals are and I don't have any passions. I want to spend more time finding what those are whether it be writing, scrapbooking, sewing, reading, or something even newer. I used to take classes like cake decorating and quilting. Since moving here that has all stopped and I now feel like I am missing something. It doesn't have to be a class just time spent on myself.

5. Give more back. For years I work in food shelters, wrapped presents, delivered food, and countless other community activities. I have gotten away from that and I feel like something is missing. We still adopt families for the holidays and we participate with our church events but I feel like I have more to give than that. Bret too has mentioned that he would like to use his skills to help but doesn't know where to begin. In Wichita he used to work at a Catholic shelter and gave free prenatal care and sonograms to moms that were unsure of what to do and needed additional support. I want to work harder to find somewhere to utilize our skills and be able to give when we have so much.

It feels great to have written that out. I feel like I am one step closer to being more mindful of the things that I want and need to work at. What do you need to be more mindful about in your life?

Choices, Choices

I love to read and have read A LOT of books. Here lately I have been going through a little bit of a dry spell. I tend to choose books in one of two ways

1) Favorite author- I have a list of authors that I have read every single book they have written. When a new book comes out you can bet that my name is on the wait list (cause I use the library) to get it ASAP. Some of these authors include Jodi Picoult, Nicholas Sparks, John Grisham, Stephanie Myers, Beverly Lewis, etc, etc). These are very main stream popular books and I love them. Some are amazing and some are par but these new releases usually keep me in plenty of reading material.

2) Popular/recently mentioned books- By this I mean books that are or about to become movies, Oprah book club books (don't judge she usually picks some good ones and she stretches my tastes..sometimes), books recommended by others.

So as I prepare to take the longest road trip of my life once again to KS in a few weeks I am starting to panic. I have nothing on my list of books to read. Although we are incredibly busy visiting family this is still our vacation and I like to take advantage of the time off. My plan for the week off is to do some fun things with kids (go to the zoo and maybe a movie), play some golf with my hubs, and read.

So because I know that some of you readers are also big "readers and lovers of books" I am asking what is/are your favorite book(s) and or what are you planning to read this summer.

Along this line I am starting a summer reading project with each of our kids too. The library has a great summer reading program for the kids (you know the kind where the log the number of pages or books that they read and get prizes in return). I also think Emily and I are going to start a novel together. Any suggestions for the first no picture book to read to an almost five year old? She is really interested in learning to read herself so if you have any suggestions on that I would love to hear them too.

Because I am in an asking mood today I am also wondering why some of you haven't become followers yet? You don't have to have a blog to follow I know (from my site counters) that I am getting way more hits than I have followers....so what are you waiting for?

Is there anything (within reason) I can do for you? Yeah tomorrow is FRIDAY!!

Say Daddy has stinky feet!

Works for a great smile everytime. Here are the pictures that we had taken at Portrait Innovations last weekend. I was pretty happy with them.

I want this, and this, and this

I know, I know another kid's birthday party post but people believe me when I tell you that birthday parties are VERY important to 4 year olds. Your entire social status may be determined for the year based on whether or not you got invited to a birthday party.

A friend called me today and asked me a hypothetical question..Would I let Emily go into Toys R Us with a scanner and create a wish list? The answer? No, probably not.

Turns out that the reason she was asking was because her daughter got an invitation to a birthday party for a 5 year old little boy and included (for the parent's convenience of course) was information about the child's gift registry at Toys R US. No I am not kidding.

While I understand that gifts are kind of a given and most children's birthday parties I don't believe that they are to be expected. I love birthday parties and we make a big deal out of them at our house. What we don't make a big deal about is the presents. We have cake, play games, and celebrate this amazing child's life and we do so with our family and friends. We invite them to join in the festivities and send them hope with a token of our appreciation for coming...not for getting us the perfect gift.

We even have friends that ask for NO gifts and instead offer and opportunity for guests to donate to their favorite charity in the child's name. While I think that is noble and kudos to those parents I know that as a child I too enjoyed the gifts brought and although we have a plethora of toys already we donate the toys to charity after they have gotten their use from them on the back end of the deal.

Registries have always been a funny thing with me. Bret and I had a hard time agreeing on anything when we registered for our wedding and we got almost nothing off of it which was fine. It was nice to be able to pick out our own dishes, bedding, and bathroom set but a lot of the gifts we didn't register were just (if not more) as useful than we would have ever guessed.

Same goes it for when we registered for a baby. We did not have the first clue to what to register for and instead relied upon a book for advice. The hand made gifts and clothes picked out by the guests were not always my styled but appreciated because they were given in love.

As the gift giver (cause you know we are now married and have two kids so we won't be getting stuff anytime soon) I feel torn between simply choosing something in our price range off the registry or being creative (and sale thrifty) and buying something of my own choosing.

I live in the outlet capital of the world and let me tell you the finds I get sometimes are unprecedented. So if you were getting married would you want to take the chance on my taste (and get perhaps an awesome piece from the Pottery Barn outlet) or what you chose for yourself from Target? I think it is a toss up. I do, however know that when it comes to getting a kid's birthday present "you get what you get and you don't get upset". HA! I love that saying from preschool. So do you shop off a registry or do you buy something you pick out?

TAT is back

And people say that peer pressure doesn't work. Totally Awkward Tuesday's is back so head over to Tova's site to check out the awesome stories this week that will give you tears of laughter.

In light of graduation season I will tell you one of our most fun/awkward graduation stories. Two years ago Bret graduated from medical school. It was for both of us one of our proudest days. There were two parts to graduation for medical students, the hooding ceremony with just his medical class, and the actual graduation with the entire University.

The hooding ceremony is very formal and probably the most important part of graduating from medical school. They take famous oath and get their hoods. I get tears in my eyes just remembering how important that night was for us.

So there we were (my parents, his parents, our siblings and their spouses, and of course me, Emily, and Palmer who was only a few months old) electric with excitement as the graduates made their grand entrance into the auditorium. We waved, clapped, and hollered with the best of them as the soon to be doctors made their way to their seats.

The moment that the music stopped, the cheering ceased, and everyone was silently waiting for the speaker to make the first introduction we hear this tiny almost 3 year old girl's loudest voice that she could make holler "DADDY I LIKE YOUR HAT!!!". It echoed in the auditorium and everyone erupted in laughter. Emily had no idea what was so funny but was beaming because her daddy said thanks and waved back to her. At the time I felt a mixture of embarrassment and "who the heck cares it was cute" feeling of euphoria. Bret and I's path was not easy through med school and Emily played a big part in all of it. It was a little reminder of how hard Bret worked at both getting through med school, being a good husband, and sometimes most importantly still being a great dad too.

Congrats to all of the graduates!

Crisis Averted- Mom saves the day

Dear Emily's preschool teacher,

You and I have not exactly seen eye to eye from the beginning of this school year. Your ability to communicate the most basic information about what is going on in your classroom to parents just flat out sucks.

For example one week's notice of an upcoming field trip and the need for parent volunteers is not even close to sufficient. You change your daily board less than once every two weeks yet when you do change it we are supposed to know immediately.

I would like to thank you for the the opportunity today to show my daughter just how amazing of a mom I am (even though it is because of your lack of communication that we had this issue to begin with). Apparently you changed your daily board YESTERDAY for the first time in a month to notify parents that TODAY was show and tell for the first time in three months.

Advanced notice would not have been imperative had you for once had any sort of system to the dates you randomly choose for show and tell. Heaven forbid we try and set a schedule that parents can count on such as every other Friday or the first Tuesday of the month. No instead we get one day's notice that we are going to have show and tell when ever it suits your mood.

So this morning when we walk in and two kids in the class have their show and tell toys (cause it would be totally implausible that we make show and tell relevant to the lesson of the week because we rarely have a lesson that is actually followed through) ready to show off to their fellow class while several other students are in tears as their parents try and figure out if they have enough time to run home and grab something to appease the tender hearts that are of this age.

Of course show and tell is a big deal to 4 year olds. It is the one chance that they get to bring in their absolute favorite things in and show them to their classmates. If for no other reason not being left out is a super sensitive issue to this age.

So being the super mom that I am I took my red faced, tear streaked child (thank you for that) back out to the car as my mind raced with possible solutions. Lucky for you the trunk and back seat of my car is never fully clean and usually has an array of random toys left behind. Although not ideal the day was saved by a fun pair of sunglasses, sun hat from last summer, and a fun book from the library about the beach we had recently checked out.

On behalf of the parents in your classroom and the PTA (you know the group that pays for the teacher's lunches on in-service days and makes it possible to purchase the extra supplies that makes your life easier and makes you look good) I would appreciate it if over this summer you developed a better system on decided what days are going to be show and tell days and on communicating with the parents what our hard earned cash is paying for when it comes to spending the day in the classroom with you.

Sincerely,

Emily's mom (aka Momma Incredible)

Facebook...please give me more information!!!

I will be the first to admit that I am a nosey person. I like to know what is going on. I don't like to spread gossip just hear about it. Facebook is usually an awesome tool for this. It gives me small glimpses into people lives even though I don't know them very well or aren't very close to them any more.

It fascinates me to see new pictures of kids from old friends from high school or younger. It lets me keep updated on friends in KS and has even given me an opportunity to get to know some family better. I love it when people announce to the facebook world that they are pregnant/engaged/etc and that I am part of that world when without facebook I would never have known. When I get a new friend request from someone I haven't talked to in 10 years it's fun to see the pictures they have of their wedding/spouse/family/children/pets and I get to catch up all in the privacy of my own home with no one really knowing that I am that curious to begin with.

What I don't like though is that sometimes you read things that just makes me ask 100 other questions. Those 25 things about me questionnaires are the worst. I see someone write that the hardest day of their lives was when their older sister died, or that they have already loved and lost their one true soul mate. What happened?

Other times it's the status bar that drives me nuts. People will say that they are very sad today or that they appreciate everyone's thoughts and prayers. Usually the person will give enough information that you get the idea of what happened but not always. I want to ask "are you OK? what happened?" but I can't.

When I read these things there becomes an imaginary line drawn. I am close enough to that person to be a facebook friend but not really close enough to ask if they are OK or what happened. I know that I am the one that draws the line because I don't feel comfortable asking..I don't want to seem nosey although admittedly I am just that.

So while the joy of getting tons of bday wishes on your birthday and getting to see newborn pictures within hours of the birth make me love facebook....not know what is going on in people's lives or knowing enough to kill the cat drives me insane.

One of the other things that I find fascinating is that reading what other people I knew write or seeing them get together for bunko parties makes me wonder if I ever moved back home (small chance in hell) if we would ever reconnect as friends once again. So much about these people (at least on the facebook surface) seem to be exactly the same. What is even crazier is how they in their older/wiser state remind me SO much of what I remember their parents to be like it is surreal.

You & Me and Me & You

The theme of this past weekend was Bret and Adriana time. I will be the first to admit that all to rarely do we take the time away from the kids to spend quality time with each other. Granted that our kids are still pretty young and go to bed around 8-8:30 so we have time every evening but that is just not the same.

So Saturday night we got a babysitter and went out. We went to a local restaurant called Mom Chaffee's. It is a hole in the wall but very romantic. The food is authentic Italian and fabulous. I had ravioli stuffed with portabello mushrooms and mozzarella covered in a chunky marinara sauce with a braised chicken breast. My mouth is watering just remembering it. The only part that stunk was the fact that I ate it all and didn't save anything to take home with me for later.

Bret had soft shell crab that was to die for (if you like that sort of thing which he totally does). We then went and saw Angels & Demons. The reviews have it pretty much right. It is not nearly as good as the book and is just an OK movie. We were going to go see Star Trek but the next showing wasn't until 9:45 and we didn't feel up to waiting that long.

The kids stayed home with a babysitter and had a great time. They played outside, made cookies, watched a movie, and popped popcorn. Overall I am not sure who had more fun us or the kids.

On Sunday we got our pictures taken (we had to reschedule from Saturday) and they turned out awesome. I will post tonight or tomorrow as I didn't have time to load them onto the computer yet. After nap time a close friend came over and hung out with the kids for a couple of hours while Bret and I hit the driving range. We had dinner and went for a great walk. Over all it was a very relaxing weekend. I think our next date is to go and play bingo. I haven't played in a long time and that sounds like so much fun. Next weekend Bret has to work on Saturday and I have to work on Sunday which is a bummer but we both have Monday off. We leave for KS on the 29th of May and I can't believe how quickly time is flying.

Why being Catholic and guilt go hand in hand

When it comes to going to church on Sundays we go through spells. Sometimes we will go months without missing once. Then we will go weeks without thinking twice about not going (OK, true for the rest of my family but as you can see I beat myself up about it for days afterwards).

It's not that Bret and I loath church. I actually like going to church together as a family. The problem is always everything else. Bret works a lot of weekends. This means that 1) we don't get to spend very much time with him and 2) we have to find time to go when he is not working/sleeping/or recovering from working.

The kids are just not at an age where I can manage them both by myself during the hour long mass. Emily is actually really good during mass and manages to be quiet and sit still for the most part. Palmer on the other is just not there yet.

I think that is the other reason we kind of subconsciously dread going. We really don't feel like we get much out of church when we spend most of the mass making sure that the kids are quiet and sit still. We take church related books or coloring books and *gasp* we usually take some sort of snack for Palmer too. On good days we feel great when leaving church but on bad days we feel exhausted and frustrated that our 2 year old couldn't be quiet.

I laugh sometimes as we are leaving because I see the other parents with the same grimace on their face as they are relieved that mass is over and that they can then take their children home and beat them (of course we don't beat our children nor do we advocate it but I'm just saying that at times you might want to).

So do you go to church weekly? What do you do to keep your kids quiet? I would really like to get back into the habit of going every week but with Bret working the next 2 weekends in a row and then a trip to KS it sure is an ideal time to make a real effort. Instead I tell the reverent women in our lives (our mothers, grandmothers, and great aunts) to pray for our souls. Laugh you might but let me tell you sometimes I think these women in our lives that pray so fervently have a direct line as we have seen the results of in our lives many times over.

Say Cheeseburger!

Today we are getting family pictures taken. We totally slacked off on getting pictures taken for Christmas and after Palmer's second birthday. Emily's birthday is in July so Bret thought it would be a good idea to go and all of our pictures for the year done at one time. So tomorrow we are getting Palmer's 2nd birthday, Emily's 5th birthday, and our family picture taken.

So after years of getting our pictures taken here are a few tips that I have learned (usually the hard way) of getting the pictures that you want in no particular order:

1. Pick a time that works for your family. For my kids that means in the morning or just after eating their lunch. If we go mid morning they usually get hungry and my kids don't do well after nap time. It takes a really long time for them to get woken up and back into their good mood. I usually try to get appointments from 9-10 at the latest so that I also have enough time to get everyone ready to go.

2. Make sure no one is hungry. That may mean bringing snacks.

3. Tell them what you want. I don't usually like the scene backgrounds that they have set up so I make sure to let my photographer not to waste shots on something I am not going to buy anyways. The photographer usually tries to do the family shots first which would be OK except my 2 year old has a short attention span. I always ask to have his pictures first (I know the photographers love me) and then the family shot. With Bret and I usually holding the kids we can keep them entertained and focused better than when Palmer is by himself.

4. If the pose isn't working move on. I remember when we first took Emily (she was 3 weeks old) to get her pictures taken. The photographer wanted to take her picture in this basket while she was naked. It was an adorable shot but everytime I tried to lay Emily into the basket she freaked out. (Being the young naive mom that I was) we tried to get this shot for 20 minutes before (in my hormonal state) I started to cry and beg that we do something else. It is more important to get a good picture of the kid then it is to get the right pose. Some of the really young photographers lose sight of this sometimes.

5. If you want good shots you have to work for them. Nothing makes a kid crack up faster than mom and dad making a fool of themselves. Sometimes when the photographer tries this it scares the kid more than make them laugh.

6. Know what you want before you get there. I know how many pictures of each kid/pose I am looking for before we walk in. This helps me figure out what I am going to buy so that I don't buy too much (or too little but that never happens). Let's not kidd ourselves here our kids are cute and sometimes that makes us get carried away. Who really (besides you and maybe grandparents) are going to want 5 different wallet poses of your kid?

I work pretty hard to make sure that our family is dressed to at least coordinate. I have seen friends' kid pictures that just wearing cute outfits and they look great. I love matching things though so that can be tough. I always wanted two girls or two boys so they can dress exactly alike (yep I am that mom don't get me started if I were to have twins).

We have tried a couple different places over the years to get our pictures taken and repeatedly our favorite place is Portrait Innovations. They take lots of shots, lots of poses, are reasonably affordable (they have a great $9.99 package), and you can get your pictures in less than 30 minutes (which is awesome). This makes life lots easier when getting holiday cards or just pictures to take back home so that you can hand them out instead of mailing them. Stay tuned to next week and I will show the results.

Rude Awakening

This morning in my very sleepy haze I thought it seemed pretty light out and I didn't remember the alarm having gone off yet. You know that feeling where you think for a second that you have no idea what time it is first thing in the morning? Yeah that was the feeling I was having as I first woke up.

Since Bret and I are both blind as bats we have to scramble to find glasses first thing in the morning so we can see the clock. Since Bret sleeps with the alarm on his side of the bed I usually quietly ask "honey, what time is it?"

I hate asking this question because I am usually too early or too late in asking. So in the first scenario I usually get a quick panic jolt from Bret and then a large sigh and a few grumbles letting me know that he doesn't appreciate me waking him up before he needs to be up.

Then in the other scenarios I get a jump straight of bed followed by loud cussing that would make you blush. The light comes on and he is running around and rushing into the bathroom to take a shower. I get orders barked at me (pick me something out to wear, go grab my pager, etc, etc) while I am still trying to pry my eyes open from the rude awakening.

I don't know what it is but some how Bret manages to over sleep at least once a month. Part of it is exhaustion. Too tired at night to remember to set the alarm or too tired in the morning to hear it and that automatic hit the snooze button response. I don't blame him. I think most of us would have a hard time getting out the door in the morning after putting in 12-13 hour days for a month straight. Of course when I ask him if he remembered to set the alarm of course he has and is annoyed that I would ask. Then when I don't ask it can some how be my fault for not reminding him.

I am a very light sleeper so it is pointless for me to have my own alarm because I am usually pretty awake when his alarm goes off. I hate the fact that he sets the alarm literally an hour before he has to get up so that he has time to "wake up". I on the other hand am usually awake the first time the alarm goes off. I think during pre-marital counseling there needs to be a session on how to manage your mornings. The alarm, who gets in the shower first, are you morning person, etc would all be topics of coverage. Let me tell you that after almost six years of marriage we are just finally getting into a reasonable routine that is upset every month with the change in Bret's rotation.

Here's hoping that tomorrow we get to sleep in to a decent time for the first time in a long time.

Reviews, Reviews, Reviews

***FYI Bret found out today that he passed his boards!!! YEAH!!***

I have mentioned before that one of my all time favorite authors is Jodi Picoult. She is fabulous. Sometimes her books are a little out there but she has a way of just captivating both your heart and your head at the same time. She asks the question "what would so and so do in such and such situation". She stretches your emotions and gives fair time to all sides. She is one of the few authors that writes a book in the many different character's point of view chapter by chapter.

I finished reading her most recent novel, "Handle with Care". It's about a girl who has Osteogenisis Imperfecta (aka Brittle Bone disorder) and her family. To help pay for their medical bills they file a lawsuit against the OB for a wrongful death suit. Wrongful death means that had they been given appropriate medical care they would have been given (and assumedly taken) the opportunity to terminate the pregnancy. One of the many twists in the book is that the OB is actually best friends with the mom filing the suit. Not surprisingly the lawsuit tears the family apart because of the stress and you know saying that you would never have given birth to one of your children had you known.

What I like about this book is the raw emotion of the characters. The mom is the most hated character that I have ever read that really has good intentions. In her heart she feels like she is doing what is best for her family. She really CAN NOT see what is happening to her family in the mean time. Your heart goes out to the family and you wish they had been dealt a different hand in life.

From the middle of the book on I realized that the ending of the book was going to make or break it for me. I am not going to spoil for you the ending but I will say that I was disappointed. Too similar to other book endings I felt like she had already played that card and should have figured something else out. Over all the book was good and I would recommend it to other Picoult fans.

In other news this summer My Sister's Keeper is coming out in the movies. When I saw Jodi speak she talked about the movie. I didn't know this but apparently when an author sells the rights to the movies that means they sold their rights. Authors have no creative say in the movie what so ever. Jodi even went so far as to tell us that she was banned from the set when she found out that they are changing the ending from the way the book ended. Regardless the movie looks awesome and I had tears in my eyes (yes I am that sappy) from the trailer alone. The early word is that this is going to be the tear jerker of the summer so get your hankies ready.

Staying in touch

I don't really have a best friend. I have some close friends but almost all of them have close friends that are probably closer than me. I always love the movies that have a group of girls that have known each other forever (usually childhood) and have stayed in touch and grown even closer over the years. I think I love these movies most because they have something that I don't. Something that I have longed and yearned for as long as I can remember.

Friends from my childhood changed every few years. I was my own person so I jumped from group to group depending on what phase I was going through. I didn't like a lot of the people I went to high school with so I became friends with kids from other schools instead. In college I left high school in the wind and continued to meet new people and make new friends. One of my college roommates and I have stayed close and if we lived closer I think we would continue to grow in our friendship. We kind of do a good job staying in touch for a while and then lose touch for a while. The good part is that we always pick up right where we left off.

Bret and I met our freshman year in college. He was kind of a wanderer when it came to friends his whole life too. Although living in a small town limited the number of groups he could jump from he managed to spread his time out pretty well. Both of us always felt (and still feel) a sense of missing something because we didn't have that family (since we look for family friends cause it makes it easier now) that we did everything with. We had that for a flash when we lived in Wichita. I keep wanting us to move back there hoping that we can rekindle what we have had for such a short time.

Sometimes I think about what it will be like when we leave PA. Regardless of where we move to when Bret is done I know that it would be very unlikely for us to make a trip back to PA. We have made friends here but like the many friends we have made over the course of our lives I wonder how many of them we will actually put forth the effort (on their part or ours) to stay in touch and stay connected. Our Christmas card list has expanded and so have our friends count on Facebook but otherwise I don't see many people making trips to see us or us to see them.

We still have a few years left in PA and a lot can happen in a few years. I miss our friends back home. I miss the girls nights out, late night scrapbooking, or even just the gossip gathering on the front porch. I miss Bret's enjoyment of hanging with the guys whether is was poker or playstation. I miss making fun of him because he and his best bud were on the outs over Madden just to hear the phone ring the next morning at the crack of dawn to hear the two make up like school girls.

I have never wanted to wish our lives away but sometimes I wish that the next two years would fly by so we can move home. We go back to KS in two weeks and I don't know who is more excited, us (Bret, me, and the kids), our parents, or our friends.

Totally Awkward Tuesdays

Today is the last Totally Awkward Tuesday for a while as Tova is going on hiatus for a while as she and her hubs go through the fun process of graduation, moving, and starting a new residency for hubs.

Sound familiar?

I promised Tova that since this was the last TAT for a while I would make it a good one so here goes it.

*NOTE* This post talks a TINY bit about topics that may make the most squeamish of you squeam. It really is pretty mild but wanted to give you a fair warning.

Palmer was born January 23 two years ago. Because of the astronomical costs of having a baby let alone a c-section we met our deductible for our insurance company and our maximum out of pocket within the first month of the year. Not a bad thing except that we were moving shortly and wouldn't be around to enjoy the benefits of this.

So shortly after he was born my personal OB (aka hubs) advised me that we (I) should get an IUD put in. The benefits sounded glorious (no monthly bill until we took it out, no additional expense, nothing to think about or do) so I readily agreed. You have to remember that at this point my mental frame of mind was very fragile. I had just had a baby, I had a two year old at home, we had just found out that we were moving across the country, were selling our house, I was getting ready to head back to work, and I was trying to find a new job at our new location. Nough said.

So I contacted my regular OB and he didn't have any vacancies for at least a month. No good as we were going to be going on vacation and moving soon. There was, however, an appointment with one of the older partners that no longer did OB (only gyn). Dr. B had to be almost 70 years old but he was very sweet. So the appointment was set.

I contacted my insurance company and found out that although we had reached our max out pocket & deductible it was still going to cost us $200 because it was considered an in office procedure, ya da ya da ya da. IUD is good for up to 5 years...you do the math.

So come the day of the placement and the first thing they ask for is a urine sample. The nurse explained that it was standard procedure to make sure I wasn't pregnant. After waiting what seemed like forever in the tiny gown in the room Dr. B and his nurse came in.

Dr. B- "So how are you feeling?"

Me- "Tired and little overwhelmed. I'm OK though."

Dr. B- "Well, that can definitely be understandable." LONG pause and he turns to get the chart.

Dr. B- "Well dear, I have a surprise for you."

Me- Thinking...OMG OMG OMG...I'm pregnant. How can I be pregnant. Well, I know how I can be pregnant. I can't breath. I am going to pass out. I can't believe I am pregnant. This is so not good. I can't take one more thing let alone this thing. What are we going to do? How are we going to afford this?

Dr. B- "Here is your check back. I know what it is like to be in your situation, your husband being a recent med student graduate. We are just going to mark it as paid and bill your insurance company for the rest."

Me- "What? I'm sorry I don't think I heard you what?" *SHOCK* Color is finally returning to my face. "You mean I'm not pregnant?" Tears are literally streaming down my cheeks.

Dr. B- "Oh no sweetie you are not pregnant."

Holy crap did have me going. I was so sure that he was going to tell me that I was pregnant and then to find out that I wasn't was such a relief. I was so emotionally exhausted that I just sat in his office and cried. Poor guy had no idea what to do and didn't know if I was relieved or disappointed. Little did he know. I felt awful that I didn't show more gratitude but I was just in shock over the whole thing. I felt like my life had flashed before my eyes. I have to admit though that when I went home and told Bret what happened it was fun to see the color drain from his face for the 10 seconds that he thought I was pregnant again before I finished the story.

My Mom

In all the craziness that was last week and this past weekend I didn't have much of a chance to write a post to my mom. I think part of that was because I have been a little homesick and missing my mom is the hardest part.

I could move anywhere in the world and although it would be hard to leave family and friends if I had Bret, the kids, and my mom, I know I would be OK. Each time we leave KS saying goodbye to her is the hardest part. There are no words for what my mom means to me. I talk to her everyday. The love that she has for my children is unmeasurable and the feeling is quite mutual.

For weeks after we moved to PA when Emily would get extra tired or didn't feel good she would cry for my mom. Last summer my mom came and stayed with us for a month and it felt like only a few days the time went so quickly.

My mom came to the US to visit her brother who was going to school when she was 27 years old. She met my father and was married in less than a year. A year after that I was born and her life has never been the same since. A few years ago my mom fulfilled a dream of hers and became a US citizen. She loves to travel, shop, and most importantly spend time with her grandchildren. She ran a home daycare for 25 years. After some life changing events my mom changed careers and applied for and got a job working at JC Penney's. She loves it and is great at it. She is nationally recognized for her sales and most importantly (at least for Penney's) her credit card application numbers.

In this past year I have seen my mom go from a very comfortable life to starting completely over. She almost never lets it get her down and she works even harder. She is more than intimidated by the world she lives in but she never lets it stop her from trying. She has called me with questions on how to get an attorney, open a new checking account, find her car title, and file her own taxes. She is becoming more and more independent and it fills me pride to see her do so. Some of my best and worst traits come from my mother and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I chocolate milkshake you

I have to tell you that Bret & the kids did a great job yesterday making me feel loved and adored. On Friday last week the kids brought home wrapped gifts that they made in school. Emily was SOO excited and couldn't wait to give it to me. She had been telling me all week that she had a surprise for me and that I was going to love it.

On Sunday morning after we all were up and around I told Emily that it was finally Mother's Day. She ran to the place where she had been hiding her gift and got Palmer's out too. Each class made a picture and had them put in a frame provided by the PTA. They looked awesome. Palmer's was a finger painting in purple (my favorite color). Emily's was an adorable flower with a cupcake wrapper for the flower and she finger painted the stem and grass. The kids also made cards which were really cute too.

Over the weekend I also got an unexpected flower & chocolate delivery. The card read "to the mother of our grandchildren, love mom and dad". At first I thought they were from my dad because that is totally something he would do except the mom and dad part as they are in the midst of a knock down drag out divorce. Turns out that my MIL sent them to me. I felt bad not realizing it sooner but in my defense the woman is not the flowers kind of gal. When I had surgery she sent me a check and told me to buy something fun. That is much more like her. I on the other hand love flowers so I was totally in love. We ate a couple of chocolates the night we got them but the next morning Palmer decided to finish them off much to Emily's horror. She came running into my room and with a very somber face told me that Palmer ate ALL of my chocolates.

The award for making this mother's day the all time best so far goes to Bret. To start with he got me the most awesome gift that I never in a million years would have guessed that he would go and buy on his own....a jogging stroller. He said that he and Palmer had tried over 10 different ones before deciding on one. I had mentioned that I had wanted one for a long time since we had been using a neighbors that is going to be moving soon. He also replaced the chocolate (and then some) that Palmer had eaten.

Besides the gifts the day was just nice. We took the kids to the zoo and spent the day together as a family which is really what it is all about. It really did feel like my day when Bret ordered a chocolate milkshake even though he really doesn't like chocolate at all (I know insane right?) for us to share. Bret knows that the fastest way to this girls heart is with chocolate.

To my Other Mother

I saw this poem in a catelog and liked it so much that I had to write it down.

This is for Bret's mom. AKA MIL, my other mother, my children's grandmother, woman who gave me hives, and someone I can always count on to be there for us.

You are the mother I received

the day I wed your son.

And I just want to thank you mom,

for the things you have done.

You have given me a gracious man,

with whom I share my life.

You are his lovely mother,

and I his lucky wife.

You used to pat his little head,

and now I hold his hand.

You raised in love a little boy,

then gave to me a man.

I'm A Mom

I know that I have used this blog to both praise my children and just as often bitch about them as well.

When Emily first came into this world I had no idea what to expect. I was 23 years old and had been married just a year. I know for a lot of moms there is no magical maternal instincts that kick in the moment you first see your child. I would agree. I knew that I was exhausted and that the baby being passed around was mine and something that I wanted to make sure was OK. The next few days were a blur as I tried to figure out how to keep her from crying. Emily will be five this July.

When Palmer came into the world I was overwhelmed with relief that he was OK. Palmer's heartbeat had dropped suddenly and we were rushed into an operating room for a crash c-section after 14 hours of labor. Exhausted and terrified that something was wrong when I heard his cry for the first time I immediately burst into tears in relief that he was OK. Palmer was such a good baby (so different from my colicky Emily) which was a relief because shortly after he was born we began our journey here to PA.

Over the past several years I learned that one thing that is consistent with all mothers is the unprecedented ability to worry. Are they eating enough, are they growing, do they feel safe, are they making friends, does Emily know her letters well enough, do they feel loved, are they spoiled, is that freckle on Emily's neck just a freckle, will Palmer's immunizations give Palmer autism, and on and on.

In addition to worry a mother is plagued with guilt. Do they resent me because I work and leave them at daycare all day, do I yell at them too much, should I spank them when they are bad, am I teaching them good manners, should I be spending more time reading to them and less time watching TV, how many times is OK to eat McDonald's in a month?

I don't have the answers. It never feels like I have the answers (except when talking to a less experienced mom then of course I have all kinds of unsolicited advice...j/k). At the end of the day a mom can only do her best and hope that that is enough. Loving my children has been the easiest thing to do. Raising them has been the hardest. I make mistakes and my children know that I am not perfect. I apologize sometimes and sometimes I admit that I was wrong. If when I die someday my children can say that I loved them and that I did my best then that is enough for me. I am honored to be their mom and I thank GOD every day for they (and Bret) are my greatest blessings.

Sanctity of Marriage

This morning Kate, of the Jon & Kate plus 8 show, made an appearance on the Today Show. Besides promoting her latest book she took the opportunity to dispel the raging rumors that Jon is cheating. She did not deny it but instead said that it was hard to believe. Rumors have been flying that a young (23?) 3rd grade teacher here in Reading has been cheating with Jon for the past several months. In fact her brother (who lives with her but has a shady past) has given media several "too much information" details attesting to the affair. The woman denies any wrong doings as does Jon, and both argue that they are just friends.

Another popular news story is today's guest on Oprah, the past presidential hopeful John Edwards and his wife Elizabeth as she discusses her newest book. In her book she goes into great detail her feelings about the affair that John acknowledged not that long ago.

America (myself included) is fascinated by the dissemination of these marriages. We read about divorce on a daily basis and most of us have experienced it for ourselves or with someone very close to us. On that same account we all also know someone that has been cheated on or who has been the cheater.

The most common reason I have heard on why men cheat is because they feel they are not getting any attention from their wives so they go looking for it somewhere else. Does this make it OK? No, I don't think so. I also don't think it is OK for wives to neglect their husbands either. (Please note that no blame is meant to be placed on anyone here as each situation is very unique and I do not mean to try and know what your situation entails or to say that someone cheated because this specific reason...this is only meant to be a general statement)

I am a big fan of Sex and the City. While Miranda has never been my favorite character I loved how the movie (which is usually not aligned with my conservative views) fought for their marriage. They were real in that it took a lot of work on both parts and it took a lot of time. There was no quick fix but both wanted to try. I loved it when Samantha of all people gave Miranda a hard time about letting herself go and how all the girls agreed "let's hurry up and get it over" wasn't a good answer no matter how tired you are. I was touched by the scene on the bridge where they were both worried that the other wouldn't show up and I loved the symbolism of leaving the past behind. I realize this doesn't work for everyone and that for some a one night mistake is much different than a full blown extended affair.

When I was younger I always thought if my man cheated he was gone. Just like that. No second chances. I realize now that it is never that simple. Love is not simple and marriage isn't either. The feelings, emotions, heart ache, and lost dreams are real. I don't know what my future would like without Bret and I hope I never have to try to picture that reality. I do know that pain and betrayal and even healing process is the most private thing you can imagine. I hope for the children's sake and for the sake of their marriage that the media (yes that means you and me) give Jon & Kate a break. Let them figure this out without the added pressure of the whole world watching. I agree that they were the ones that invited the whole world into their living room in the first place.

So like Charlotte in Sex in the City I plan to go home and remind (in a very subtle way) my husband that he is not neglected at home and that he is getting plenty of attention and I pray that we will never have to venture down that torturous path where we would have to fight for our marriage.

3 am wake up call

I was home yesterday because my kids were sick. It was a regular night until at just before 3 am I get woken up by a crying "MOM! I'm sick!" from Emily.

What is it about 3 am? Why can't kids get sick right after you put them to be before you yourself go to sleep? Why can't they get sick at 6am when you need to be up anyways? It always seems to hit right during your heaviest sleep time and always too late to make it back to sleep for any amount of time.

The thing I HATE most about being a mom is cleaning up vomit hands down. I will take all other bodily fluids before vomit. I just can't do it. Some people say that in a marriage you need to have someone who will kill bugs. I say that you need to have someone who can clean up vomit and that person is definitely not me. From the beginning of having children Bret has been the sole parent responsible for this duty. I have the weakest stomach in the world and just walking into a room where someone has gotten sick is enough to have me doubled over and heaving. So my job is usually cleaning the kids up. In my house that means an automatic bath without plugging the water because that is just gross. Even if you made it to the bathroom you take a bath because there is nothing worse than a spot in your hair or your hands or whatever that may smell still. The kids have learned this about me and don't even question it. I usually have to take a shower afterwards too because otherwise I go to bed paranoid that maybe something got on me and I missed it. I get nauseous just thinking about. So for today give your kudos to Bret for rinsing out sheets, pillow cases, PJ's, and wiping up stuff you don't even want to think about. I love you honey for not making me take care of this.

The ironic part is that of course I keep the kids home and they are fine the rest of the day. Not just fine but full of energy. Of course if I would have sent them to school they would have gotten sick and then I would be the bad parent for not taking care of them. You just can't win.

Sappy Mess...It must be the weather

I am an emotional wreck today. I have no idea why but I think it is this dreary weather that we have been having lately in PA. It started this morning when I dropped my kids off. Palmer cried as I was leaving and calling "momma" very loudly. Then Emily, who never gets that upset when I leave, was a little more clingy than usual. We have this routine where she waits by the window and I go out to the car and before getting in I wave, blow kisses, make silly faces, and essentially make a complete fool of myself to make her laugh. Today she waved but when I got in my car I noticed that she had tears streaming down her cheeks. I could see her face turn a little pink as she tried not to let herself cry and I had to hurry out of the parking lot before she saw me cry. I get teary just thinking about it.

Kids are funny that way. Daily life whizzes by at 100 mph and we spend so much time running from place to place, worrying about everything, and just struggling to get through a day. Then when you least expect it someone pulls the emergency brakes. I have read several blogs that talk about how we don't need a special day for mom's; that we should appreciate our moms everyday. While I agree, the reality is that we need a day designated to do this because sadly some of us with the best of intentions just fall short of doing that. I want to do that for all of the moms in my life and I need my family to do that for me...just one day of the year.

I got this email a long time ago and found out recently it is actually a book. A portion of the book was reprinted in an article I found online.

I got the email last year when I had been struggling with finding a job and was staying home with the kids. IF ever I read something that totally was an "aha" moment for me it was then.

Totally Awkward Tuesday

It's Tuesday and you know what that means! Tova's totally awkward Tuesday.

I was beginning to think that I had run out of awkward stories to tell when I realized that they don't all have to be my stories. So of course who better to tell a story about then my dear hubs.

Bret is at the end of his second year as an OB/GYN resident. Some of the best stories I have heard (like roll on the ground dying of laughter best) are from him and the other residents as they take part in people's most life changing (and sometimes awkward) moments in life. So in honor of Mother's Day week here is one of my favorite delivery stories.

One of the residents was getting ready to deliver a couple's third child. When the baby was delivered the resident held the baby up and said "congratulations you have a healthy baby BOY".

The resident didn't really know what to say when the mom replied "WHAT?" "It can't be a boy...it's supposed to be a girl. Our third girl. We didn't buy any clothes and the room is PINK" The mom started to cry and the resident looked over at the dad and he was very pale. He sat down and just looked at the resident with tears streaming down his cheeks. "It's a boy?" the dad asked. "They said it was a girl." The dad was obviously in shock. The mom just kept saying..."but the room is pink what are we going to do? We don't even have a name picked out."

The attending (the couple's doctor) asked the resident who did the ultrasound. The resident looked while praying that it wasn't them and said...."you did". The attending looked up and said "really?" and then took the file to look for them self.

At the moment the resident was in the middle of a very awkward situation. I think after the hormones die down and the shock wears off the family is going to have a great story to tell. The resident said that the best part was the combination of the joy mixed with shock of the father while the mother was worrying about the logistics. I guess some things are the same in a lot of families.

Not Me Monday

I have posted before about Stellan's fight for his life. He is now home with the rest of the family doing awesome. McMamma has been doing this meme for a while and I have finally decided to participate. For rules, the button, etc, etc, check out My Charming Kids

1. My kids did not eat McDonald's for lunch twice this weekend. Nope. I would never feed them greasy fast food once let alone twice.

2. I did not spend the weekend reading the newest Jodi Picoult book, Handle with Care, and watching Mamma Mia in my pajamas instead of doing laundry, cleaning the house, and running much needed errands. No way that I would do that.

3. It was not me who got caught up in the drama/gossip of a recent firing of a teacher at the kids' daycare. I did not nose around trying to figure out what happened to one of only two male teachers who was suddenly not working there after nine years. I would never do that because I always mind my own business.

4. It also was not me who got miffed at another mom during the fundraising function I was in charge of this weekend because she tried to take charge. Nope, doesn't bother me a bit when she suddenly started giving out orders even though she just got there and had not idea what was already said or planned. I also didn't bitchily reply back to her that it looked like she had everything under control when she asked what I thought.

Wow that was fun. What didn't you do this past weekend or week?

Mom's Week

This week in honor of Mother's Day that is this upcoming Sunday I am going to pay tribute to the different "moms" in my life. Yes I only have one mother but there are several woman that play an important role in my life and in the life of my children.

Today the mom I honor is Kyla. Kyla is Bret's younger sister. She is not a mom yet but will be an awesome mom someday. What she is to my kids is the coolest aunt any kid could ever ask for.

Kyla lived with us for almost a year. She moved in for what was going to be a few weeks to maybe a month until she found an apartment and a roommate. It kind of became a running joke in the house when Ky would come home after looking at a new apartment with a possible roommate. To be honest we loved having her live with us and wouldn't have cared if she continued to stay with us.

When we got home from Match Day we had to tell Kyla that we were moving to PA. At the time she acted like it wasn't going to be that big of a deal but later she told us that she cried all the way back to her apartment. She had become such a big part of our family that we didn't know what we were going to do.

No one in our family loved having Kyla live with us more than Emily. Emily was not quite two when Kyla moved in with us and she worshiped the ground Kyla walked on. Emily would go downstairs to Kyla's room every morning and just sit on her bed and watch Kyla get ready. Kyla would humor Emily by handing her the deodorant to pretend to put on when she was done, put make up on her (blush/powder and lip gloss), and sometimes curl her hair. Kyla always liked to dress Emily up like she was going to a party instead of daycare and I will never forget how excited Emily was to have RED nail polish on her tiny fingers and toes. I, without a doubt, blame Kyla for how girly Emily is. Her fascination with all things make up, hair, nails, clothes, and primping come directly from Kyla.

That year of the two of them living together has formed a bond that will never be broken. For the longest time Emily referred to her as "my Kyla". Emily is also in love with Kyla's soon to be husband Lucas. He has been a part of our family since Kyla was in high school so the wedding is just making it more official. Emily can't wait to be Kyla's flower girl in June and we can't wait to see one of her dreams come true. Kyla is also getting ready to graduate from dental hygienist school and we couldn't be more proud.

Kyla thank you for being such a special part of my children's lives. We love you so much.

Rainy Day

Bret is working today and it is raining outside. How much more of a downer can we get on a Saturday? Actually it's not that bad. It's actually nice to have a low key Saturday ever once in a while just to get caught up around the house.

I have this weird thing that it is so hard for me to get motivated around the house when Bret is home. Part of it is that I have to get him motivated too and sometimes I just don't have enough motivation in me for both of us. So when Bret is working I usually try and get "house" stuff done in the morning so that I have the afternoon to myself when the kids are napping and with them when they are awake. We have been enjoying being outside in the nice weather so much lately that it is still kind of a bummer that it is raining.

Boredom sometimes is so closely related to rainy days that we have to plan ahead of time to ward it off. Some of the things that we do to ward off the boredom is head to the library, bake cookies, read books, do a craft project, or our all time favorite is to pop popcorn and watch a movie. There is just nothing better than cuddling up to your kids with a blanket with comfy clothes (aka PJ's) on to watch a movie. Of course nothing needs to be said about the joys of popcorn.

Of course we usually try and make a visit in to daddy when he stuck working on the weekends and that helps lift everyone's spirits. What do you do on a lazy rainy Saturday?

Freaky Friday

Before my mom moved to the United States she was working towards becoming a clinical psychologist. She came here to take some time off after completing the equivalent of a masters degree and before starting her doctorate. Some how those plans got derailed when she met, married my father, and had three kids instead. One of the things that my mom learned how to do and was very skilled at was hypnosis.

Mom was very careful about using hypnosis and in all honesty I only remember seeing her hypnotize someone once EVER. It happened when I was 9 years old and my parents were having a party.

My dad had a really good friend that was a lot of fun. He always gave my mom a lot of static in good fun and always said that he didn't believe in hypnosis one bit. He thought it was a crock and that people were just pretending. After a few drinks and LOTS of smack talk my mom was finally talked into hypnotizing my dad's good friend.

After the very typical relaxation technique that you see on TV (only this was in our living room) my mom had him almost asleep. I will never forget what happened next.

My mom went to the kitchen and grabbed an onion and a potato. She peeled the onion and put it into Bill's hand.

Mom: "Bill?"

Bill: "Yes, Nina?"

Mom: "How are you feeling Bill?"

Bill: "Oh, Nina...I feel very good and very relaxed. Almost sleepy"

Mom: "Bill that's good. Bill I have something for you. It's an apple. But not just any apple. This apple is the most ripe, juicy, and delicious apple you have ever eaten."

Mom then gave the apple to Bill and asked him to go ahead and try the apple (it was actually the onion). Even though his eyes were wide open Bill never thought twice that the onion she was handing him was the best apple he had ever seen.

Bill: Took a huge bite and wiped his mouth with his sleeve as if the juice was over flowing. "Oh Nina where did you get this apple? I have never tasted anything so sweet and juicy."

Everyone sat with their jaws open and couldn't believe that he was eating the onion. The smell of onion was so strong that our eyes were all watering. Bill ate the onion just like it was an apple with a core around the middle. Next mom took the potato.

Mom: "Bill? Do you like ice cream?"

Bill: "Oh, yes Nina."

Mom: "Bill would you like an ice cream cone?"

Bill: "Oh, yes Nina. Do you have chocolate?"

Mom: "Of course Bill."

She took the potato and wiped off most of the dirt and handed it to Bill.

Bill took the potato and held the bottom like it was a cone with ice cream in it. Without even thinking twice he licked the potato. Mom shushed the room full of giggles and never broke a smile. Not only did Bill lick the potato but he bit into it too like you would a cone. He ate the entire thing and told my mom thank you. By this point mom felt that Bill had learned his lesson for giving her such a hard time. Within minutes she put him back to a sleep like mode and woke him up. Bill came awake convinced that it didn't work at all. He felt like nothing had happened and accused everyone of making it all up just to give him a hard time. I don't think Bill ever really believed that anything really happened but he never gave my mom a hard time about it again.