3.31.2009

You Know You're Back in KS When...

It was good to be home even under the circumstances. However, there were a couple of funny situations that made me think that these things only happen in KS. So without further ado here are the top ten ways you know you are back in KS.

10. When someone says "look a rooster" you know they are not talking about a chicken.

9. For three hours you drive through one of the worst snow storms of your life and then at a certain point in the highway it's sunny, clear, and doesn't have a flake of snow in site for miles.

8. You go to a dinner after the funeral and by looking at the dishes (because of course it is a pot luck) you know a) who brought it b) which is the best choice and c) you have every recipe of every side dish and dessert brought and they are all in the same church cookbook.

7. The casino is five minutes from your mom's house (Indian reservations are grand).

6. In some parts of KS you have to let your car warm up for 10 minutes before you can even begin to get the ice off and at the exact same moment in other parts of KS you don't have to wear a coat it's so nice outside and the very next day it is the exact opposite weather on the exact opposite sides of the state.

5. People look at you like you are speaking a foreign language when you say words like rutch over, stop by a MAC for cash, Schuylkill, quarter of five, and soda.

4. When you say that the apple pie is good but not as good as an apple dumpling they have no idea what that is but are sure that they want one.

3. Windmills line the interstate and moving like crazy because it BLOWS like crazy in KS and there is NO trees anywhere.

2. You can see for 20 miles in any direction from the interstate because there are NO trees and it is breath taking.

1. You hit your brakes when you see a cop set up with a radar and you freak because you are totally speeding and then your realize you are going 77 miles per hour. After a brief moment of panic you laugh because you are not speeding in KS because the speed limit in KS is usually 75.

Totally Awkward Tuesdays

To participate check out Tova's site.

We travel a lot with the kids. As such we have become almost pro's at kid traveling whether it is on a plane, car, bus, or even a huge cruise ship. One of the "keep the busy/quiet" that I planned for our plane trip back to Kansas was to down load some kid albums to my ipod and Bret's iphone. We knew the kids loved music as we listen to CD's in the car all the time but had never tried head phones on the plane before.

As we are pulling out of the Harrisburg terminal for our first connection to Chicago Bret puts the head phones on Emily and turns on my ipod. She is sits and listens for a minute and then out of no where she said "IT'S A LITTLE LOUD!!!" at almost a yell. Half of the plane started cracking up as Bret scrambles to turn down the volume. A few minutes later and Emily is singing her heart out to Old Mac Donald, Wheels on the Bus, Itsy Bitsy Spider, and just about every other children's song you can think about. Lucky for us the people around us thought it was cute.

Stay tuned for a fun "You know your back in KS when" top ten list.

3.27.2009

Freaky Friday


If you would like to participate write a freaky story that makes the hair stand up on the back of your neck and link back to here. Then leave me a message that you participated and I will update with a link to your blog.

I may have mentioned that Bret lived in a fraternity while going to college. What you didn't know is that the house their fraternity lived in used to be a hospital in the mid nineteen hundreds.


One of the first nights after Bret and I first started dating his fraternity was having a party. It was also Bret's birthday. My girlfriends and I showed up at the party and I remember telling her "either this guy is an alcholic or he is really dumb" due to the number/amount of drinks he was consuming over a short period of time. Turns out it was the latter.

Bret's room was on the third floor of the frat house and in the far corner of the building. In fact his closet used to be part of the elevator shaft and it was less than glamorous. After getting Bret settled in for the night I took the couch. Yes I am that good girl.
During the middle of the night I kept hearing scratching on the walls. Bret also had (yes he still has this) a pop bottle collection of old glass pop bottles and they were displayed in part on the window sill of his room. These bottles started moving around and clinking. I was totally freaked out and wasn't sure if maybe I had a little to much to drink also (or something was in my drink?) or if I was just freaking myself out but I was scared shitless. So I moved to the floor on the opposite side of the room and finally passed out. The next morning I woke up and was FREEZING. Bret too woke up shortly there after and asked me "why did you open the window so far last night. Seeing that my eyes were big as saucers he figured out that it was most likely not me that opened the window during the night when it was 30 degrees outside.

"Oh, it must have been George." Bret replied. WTF?!?! George is the friendly ghosts that haunts the fraternity that used to be a hospital. Legend has it that he fell out of bed and got trapped between his hospital bed and the wall and was never found until he died. Some of his common showings was opening and closing locked doors/windows, turning on and off the lights, turning on the electricity for the ENTIRE house when there was neighborhood outage at 4pm so that he could watch Star Trek, and random other weird things (like moving glass bottles and making scratching noises on the wall). OK I am pretty freaked out. Due in part to my huge fear of running into George again (and in part to the fact that the house was not that pleasant to stay in aka 30 guys and random girls) we RARELY ever stayed overnight in the frat house again. However inevitably George seemed to like me a lot because he always showed up too in varying degrees. Happy Freaky Friday!

3.26.2009

Rock On

Little known fact. When Rock Band first came out Bret and I were on the wait list to get it for the PS3. Not only were we the first to buy the game we were also ranked in the top 100 nationwide for points. Yep hubs and I were unstoppable.

In case you didn't know Rock Band is similar to Guitar Hero only it has a drum set and mike in addition to the guitar. It is really fun game to play by yourself, with a group of people, or just the two of us. We have not played the game in AGES. We have gotten it out a few times when we had people over and when Bret's sister and her fiance were in town for Christmas they played it quite a bit. Last night when I got home from work I walked in to find Bret having a good 'ole time playing the drums. The kids love the games too and I am amazed how they are really not too bad. Emily can keep a pretty good beat and Palmer is good with colors. So instead of doing any of the million things that need to be done before we leave for KS tomorrow we rocked on with the impending threat from mom that tomorrow we have all got to chip in to get stuff done.

I laid awake most of the night making lists in my head. Lists of what to pack, what to buy, and what needs to be done. It will get done...some how.

3.25.2009

When you Love someone

Sometimes you just have to say yes. The person I love most in life is grieving. So even though we don't exactly have the money, it isn't the ideal time to take off, it is very last minute, and is in all definitions not really reasonable or sensible I said yes. I said yes because I know that if it was me that wanted to go home and if I was the one who needed to be close to my family and my friends he would say yes. He would say of course and he would make it happen. So I am making it happen and I am holding him a little closer and kissing my children a little extra because life is precious and we are so blessed.

3.24.2009

Jonny May

Today a good friend of ours passed away. He and my husband had been friends since they were 5 years old. He will be missed. You can read about his life and struggles against cancer on his blog. RIP Jonny.

Help! I'm trapped!

We moved from a 4 bedroom house into a two bedroom apartment when we moved from KS to PA. For the first 9 months or so we had a lot of our stuff kept in storage unit. However, it didn't take us long to realize how much money we were spending to store our stuff. So we sold alot. We put our practically new washer and dryer on Craigslist and sold it in two days. I had the mother of all garage sales and sold over $800 worth of stuff including a book shelf, patio furniture, end tables, coffee table, books, videos, kids clothes, toys, AND SO MUCH MORE. It was a great sale and it felt really good to get rid of stuff. We then took a bunch more stuff to good will.

In the basement of our apartment complex we have a storage area. It has a door on it and a lock (not that we ever lock it). It is not very big (compared to the unit we were renting) but it is nice to have. After all of our selling we managed to literally cram everything into this unit. However, it is tight. In fact it is impossible to get anything else into it or out of it because it is jammed packed from floor to ceiling. This drives me insane. Mostly because I can never find anything that I am needing/wanting and usually just have to forgo it but also because it is so packed some things have gotten broke. What is the point of having these things if I can't ever find or use them. What do you ask is in the storage unit? Our Christmas tree and decorations, the crib and dresser, Emily's toddler bed, a toy box full of crap, lots of kids clothes that are now to small, other holiday decorations, our China (from our wedding), my wedding dress (it is in a sealed box), other wedding stuff, a tub of maternity clothes, books (Bret's mostly classics and good books for our someday library), a gun cabinet (yes there are guns in it), poker table, card table, high chair, toys that we want to reuse someday with our other kids, luggage, camping stuff, and so much more I can't even begin to list it all.

So where do we go from here? Part of me wants to continue to get rid of everything and the other part says no just hang on to it. I wonder sometimes if I would really miss having the kids clothes when we have another child. I have gotten rid of so much and what I have kept I have let other people borrow. UGH!!

So last night I was frustrated because there were several things that I wanted and I knew that asking Bret for help was pointless. He hates going into that storage unit and refuses unless I beg, plead, cry, and threaten. So I decided to take on the unit and find 1) Easter decorations, eggs, and the kids' baskets, 2) My wedding stuff so I can have some things that I promised SIL she could borrow, and 3) the maternity tub and a kids outgrown clothes tub to add some things that people who borrowed had returned. I was also hoping to find my tostone board but that was hoping big.

It was a nightmare and although I was making my way through things at one point I had an avalanche and although nothing broke and I was ok...I was trapped. The poker table happened tipped over and I was behind it on the opposite side of the door. Then several boxes tipped over on top of that and literally I was trapped. The kids were playing outside with some of the neighbors and I knew that even if I sat there and yelled no one would ever hear me. I also didn't think I wanted them to come find me because it was a weird situation to be in. So I did what anyone else would do. I dug myself out of that hole and crawled out. This was the straw that broke the camels back. I am once and for all going to sort and organize that unit if it kills me. I used to be the person who hung on to everything well there is nothing like living in tiny living quarters to make you change that habit fast.

3.23.2009

Identity Crisis

Some good friends that I used to work with back in KS were in Philly over the weekend for a convention this week. Bret and I drove down and dinner with them. It was great to see them and catch up. It was even greater to have a babysitter and a nice evening out without the kids.

During the course of the evening my good friend asked if we were going to move back to KS more importantly the town that we used to live in. Honestly I have no idea. I don't know where we are going to live. This does not surprise me as I have said for a long time that it is easier for Bret and I to say where we won't live rather than where we will. The part that did surprise me is that for the first time in a long time I don't know where I WANT to live.

Don't get me wrong I loved living in Wichita. There are plenty of places that I would love to own a home, they have some great schools, our friends are there, and it is a good distance from both sides of the family. However I'm not sure where I would work. I don't see a place for me any more at WSU. I don't think I would want my old job back (not saying that it would even be available) or where else in the college I would fit. I just don't know what I want anymore. I don't know if I want to stay at home with the kids until they are older or if I want to go back to school and get my Ph.D or if I want to stay in the working world. I just don't know.

I have always known. I have always had a plan and I have always had goals. Life has not always gone according to my plan and I think that since the move out here I have been a little gun shy to try and make more plans for our future. Instead I pray and I have faith. God has a plan for me and this time I am trying to let him guide me. Bret too has a lot of unknowns when it comes to his path so that may be part of my uncertainties. Of course if he decides to pursue a fellowship I have to be ready to support that path and let me tell you it will definitely be a ride different from if he doesn't.

While the unknown still bothers me the frustration is nothing compared to what it used to be. I know no matter what I will be happy as long as my family is close to me. The rest will figure itself out because it always has.

3.20.2009

Freaky Fridays

So today marks the second week of Freaky Friday. If you would like to participate write a story (it doesn't have to be true but at least let us know if your not sure or if it didn't happen to you) that will make the hair on the back of your neck raise up and give you goose bumps. Then link back to this blog and leave a comment letting me know you participated. I know I have some readers that don't have their own blog so either leave your short short story in the comments or email it to me and I will post it for you at adriana.heskett@gmail.com.
An old college roommate and his wife lived in NC in an older house for a few years. About a year ago his wife told this amazing story that happened to them
It was the middle of the night and wife kept hearing the toilet run and then shut off. You know how sometimes the flapper sticks so the toilet keeps running because it can't get full. Well that was what it was doing but instead of running constantly it would run for a minute and then shut off then run again a few minutes later. Wife got up once and stumbled into the bathroom to jiggle the handle and it stopped for a few minutes so she went back to bed. Just as she got back into bed it started running again then stopping then running. Annoyed and just wanting to get some sleep she decided to check it out further.

She went to the bathroom and flipped the light on and took the lid off the toilet and this is what she found.













Wife said that it took less than a second for her to be on top of the bathroom sink screaming even though it was 3 am and she was half asleep. Her drowsy husband had no idea what the heck was going. So they contacted animal control and were told to do this.


Yep they told them to put ice in the tank because the cold would make it sleepy. So they did.

And this is what the snake thought about that idea.
It got PISSED! It started to his and act like it was going to strike and yep it started to try and get out and yes that is a curtain rod that he is using to try and contain it. What would you use?





So here is a picture of my roomie in all of his glory in the middle of the night trying to contain a huge snake.







They finally got it out of the house and got back to bed and had a really restful night. NOT! I don't think I would ever have been able to sleep again in that house. Luckily they moved not long later. I don't know about you but I don't think I will ever remove the lid to the back of the toilet again. Happy Friday!

Check out these other Freaky Tales

It Is What It Is Sometimes
Up Rooted

3.18.2009

Clear my mind

I was in a really bad mood last night. I was glad that Bret was able to take the kids out to Em's gymnastics class because really I just wanted to be left alone. Some days are just like that. I couldn't figure out how to just move past some of the hurt/pissed off feelings that I had over something that happened that was just stupid yesterday. My friend called and asked if I wanted to go running since it was pretty nice outside yesterday. YES! So after a hard 3 miles I started to feel much better. My running mate is awesome because we both have our ipods and we just run. No talking or trying to make small talk. Just listening to your headphones and focusing on your breathing. It was so refreshing to be able to clear my head of all the crap that was making me feel like crap. By the time Bret and the kids got back I was a completely different person. Before running I didn't really have a good way of working through my own thoughts. I would usually hash things out with Bret and then stew over it at night when I should be sleeping. Not only is this much better for my sleeping time but it's good for my health too.

3.17.2009

Totally Awkward Tuesday- Conclusion to the Pee Trilogy

As always to participate check out Tova's site.

Bret lived in a fraternity for his first year at college. I am not a big fan of Greek life and thereby wasn't a big fan of staying over at the frat house. Bret's frat house was well know for it's parties and thereby not so well know for the condition of the house that held those parties. The one nice thing about the house was that there was always something going on. On one particular fun night we were playing cards with some of the other brothers. Some of the older guys were getting home from the bars with their dates. One of Bret's good friends happened to bring home a couple of VERY drunk girls with him. So here we are minding our own business drinking a couple of beers and playing cards when one of the super drunk girls comes streaking through the main commons room. By streaking I mean totally and completely naked and the guy was trying to catch her and haul her off back to his room to get her dressed and hopefully let her pass out so she could sleep it off.

That weekend happened to be a home game so lots of people were at the house getting ready for the game the next day and the big tail gate they always held. One of the guys that Bret was friends with was a pretty soft spoken and reserved type of guy. He was super nice but really a big nerd (of course he was a nerd if he was friends with Bret) and his dad happened to be staying over that night because he was going to the game the next day. To make a long story short the crazy naked girl stumbled into this poor boy's room who's dad was sleeping on the couch. The drunk girl went up to the dad who I think was pretty much asleep and started to make out with him. Then the next thing you know the drunk girl is squatting and peeing right there on the floor in front of this kid's dad. The guy who brought the girl home was running all around the house and when he finally found her there was quite a commotion because apparently she didn't want to leave.

Bret and I are at a loss on trying to figure out who was scarred more that night the kid or his dad. Bret seems to think that the dad wouldn't think of it as that bad of a night since he got a little action for a drunk college girl.

The really awkward part is that because it was a frat house there is only one girls bathroom on the main floor in the commons room. Of course after a night of drinking I had to run down there early in the morning and wouldn't you know who else had to pee. Yep there she was in a t-shirt and nothing else. "Crazy night huh" she said to me. What do you say back? "Yep, pretty crazy" I replied. Poor girl had no clue.

The Word On The Street is

Yesterday I posted about the girl who got fired. Rumor (from a pretty reliable source) has it that she was fired because she was having an affair with one of the counselors she supervised. Someone mentioned sexual harassment but I'm not sure why he would have been fired too if it was SH. The story gets even more interesting when you find out that her husband threw her out of the house when he found out she was cheating and they were going through a nasty divorce and he told her that he is gay. I feel bad for her child who is only 3. There isn't much work in the area and because of the whole custody stuff she isn't going to be able to pick up and move either. Talk about bad decisions resulting in bad results.

3.16.2009

Full Circle

About two years ago shortly after we found out that we were moving to PA I applied for a job as the director of financial aid at a university here in town (not the one I currently work at). A head hunter out of NY contacted me and from there I was flown out for an interview and wined and dined. I found out later that I was one of the final two candidates. The other candidate was an internal candidate that had started at the office as a counselor and was currently their associate director. They ended up giving her the job and asked if I would come out for a second interview for the associate director position. I was not exactly enthused as I was still bummed that I didn't get the job but thought what the heck, it was free trip for Bret and I to come and see the area and look for a place to live.

During the second interview trip it was CLEAR that the new director and I were not going to be a good fit. It started with her inviting me by email to dinner with my spouse and her and her spouse. She wanted to meet at 6:00pm the night before the interview. Our flight got in just after noon that same day and we were scheduled to meet with our realtor at 2pm. Thinking that we may be pressed for time because of the flight, commute from the airport, etc, etc. I emailed her back that we would love to do dinner but where wondering if we could move the dinner time to 7pm. She emailed back that no, that wouldn't work because she had a 2 year old and they had a bed time that they needed to keep with. OK.

The next day the interview went OK. It was clear that she was concerned that I would be insubordinate because I didn't get her job. I was just playing the role that I just wanted the job and that this would be a better fit for me since I was new to the area. I asked a couple of questions about compliance issues that I had found during my initial interview process and she said that there were no issues and that everything was on the up and up. Needless to say that I didn't get the job and I wasn't too disappointed.

Fast forward two years to this morning and my boss came in with some interesting news. She had been at a state meeting last Friday and the buzz is that this person who got the job over me and one other person in her office were "let go" on Friday. My boss said that the lid is being kept shut pretty tight as to why but that no one else in the office really expected and where as shocked as we are. During these economic times I don't wish anyone to lose their job but it does make me wonder WTF happened? It is times like these that I wish I was still in KS where I know EVERYONE in the business and am usually in the "know". I think that this is just another one of those instances that shows that everything happens for a reason it just takes a while to figure out why.

3.13.2009

Freaky Friday

If you would like to participate in Freaky Friday write a hair raising story on your blog, link back to this blog, and leave a comment letting us know that you did so.

I have a second cousin (my cousin's son) that as a child had the most interesting quality....he talked to ghosts. Not just any ghost but very specifically my grandfather. While there are many stories that I could tell you about his and my grandfather's interactions for my first FF post I will tell you the one that convinced me the most. His interactions had been taking place for a while before this specific situation happened.

My aunt and uncle (his grandparents) were in California for a week visiting their son so my cousin (his mom) was taking turns with her sister in going out and checking on my grandmother who still lived on the family farm by herself. Mind you my grandfather had passed not quite two years before any of this had happened and my cousin was about one when he passed. Any knowledge of my grandfather was unexplainable since he had been so young when he was alive.

So on his mom's night to go visit my grandmother she was not feeling well at all and realized that she was probably coming down with a bad cold. Not wanting to pass it on to my grandmother she told her son that they were not going to be able to go visit GM. The young boy became very upset and started to cry saying that they had to go because he promised GP (that is what we all called my grandpa) that he would be there to visit with him. His mom had told me that she had always felt very torn about how to handle these stories from her young child. He was so set on what was happening that she decided to talk him through it.

She told him that it would be fine because they would go the next day and GP would be there then. The child shook his head no and explained that no, GP would not be there that day because he was going to be with his grandma and grandpa on their way home from CA. The mother explained that his grandparents were not leaving until Saturday (two days later) and that it would be fine for them to visit GM the next day. The child gave in and didn't say anything else about it the rest of the evening. The next day at work his mother received a call from her mom saying that she hadn't been feeling well and they had decided to leave town early and had been on the road for about six hours. They would be home the next day.

True story. I promise to be completely honest about how I heard about a story. If it is something that someone else to me or I read it or whatever I will let you know. Now it's your turn and I can't wait to have chills. Happy Friday!

100th Post and New Meme

This my 100th post. Yeah!! In light of that I have been thinking all week about how I wanted to celebrate this mile stone. At first I thought about a give away but decided I wanted to save that for the motivation of getting more followers/comments. So instead I decided to create my own Meme for Friday's. I don't read a ton of blogs so if this one is already out there I'm sorry I didn't know.

The new meme is.......Freaky Friday. So here is what I am trying to do. Post a story that you have either experienced or were told or even just heard about that is freaky. Please let me be clear that by Freaky I mean raise the hair on the back of your neck, give you goose bumps, and send a shiver down your spine (not the other kind of freaky). I thought this would be a fun meme partly because since I might be the only participant for a while (ever) I wanted to be sure I had plenty of stories that would keep you entertained for a several weeks at least and Oh Boy do I. So check back (at least) every Friday to read about snakes, ghosts, Angels, and other unexplainable happenings.

If you would like to participate write a freaky story, link back to here, and leave a comment so others can go read your stories too. For the readers that I have who don't have a blog and don't want to have a blog feel free to leave your story in the comments or email the story to me and I will be sure to post them for you.

3.12.2009

Update

So getting up early for Lent has gotten a little lax lately. Bret is working a rotation where he isn't having to get up quite as early and so my motivation has waned slightly. It was easier to get my butt out of bed when he was up first but now the idea of getting up before him has not really sat well with my internal clock that begs for a few more minutes. I hate this because I heard myself this morning rushing the kids around and mentally keeping my self from yelling "LET'S GO!!!" or "HURRY UP". Ugh

I showed a friend a picture of the dress that I am supposed to wear and she pointed out something that hadn't hit me before...the dress is totally designed for the 5'8 or taller type of girls that are also bridesmaids...not the 5 foot nothingness of me. If you don't believe me please feel free to check out the dress for yourself at David's Bridal. The style code is D18293 and the dress is in Apple RED. My MIL mentioned that "so and so" is bigger than you and bustier and the dress looked nice on her although she did look like she might fall out a bit but I am sure with a good bra you will be just fine. Thanks, I feel so much better. Her intention is in the right place...right?

Bret had stay late last night so he didn't get home until after 7 and by the time we had dinner and got the kids off to bed it was getting late. My two running buds were not available so after much begging and pleading I finally convinced Bret to "walk" with me. Luckily since he is over 6 ft tall he has long legs and his "brisk" walk is comparable to my "slow" jog. It was something at least.

This weekend is the first weekend Bret has not worked in almost a month and we are all so excited. I think we might take a trip to the aquarium as we haven't been there before. I have heard different opinions on whether the NJ or Baltimore one is better. Thoughts? Hopefully I will have some fun pictures to post soon as our other adventure for the weekend is to get family photos taken. Fun, fun!

3.11.2009

Understudy Bridesmaid

My SIL is getting married this summer to her high school sweet heart. We love her soon to be husband and he has felt like family forever. Long story short SIL did not ask me to be a bridesmaid but instead asked me to be her personal attendant. I was hurt b/c I felt like we were more like sisters than that. She was in my wedding, she lived with me for a year, I have been in her family for over 10 years, etc, etc. I told her my feelings were hurt, she felt bad, but was set on having her BFF's be the ones standing at the alter with her (she is having 5 bridesmaids). Fast forward several months and all was well. I got over it and was excited to help with the planning.

Then a couple of days ago I saw her facebook status and it said something about being super stressed about the wedding and something about not everything was going smoothly for the first time. So being the good sister I called her to see what was up and how I could help. Little did I know the "how I could help" part was going to be key.

One of SIL BFF's brothers just got engaged and are planning on getting married in Vegas on the same day so she had to bow out. So here I am trying to convince SIL that this isn't that big of a deal. She can have the Best man stand at the alter with the groom, she can had two guys escort one girl, or she can ask one of her other BFF's to stand in. Then there was this awkward pause where she starts to say that if I want to say no she completely understands but she really wants to ask me to be a bridesmaid.

My response was of course. I want her to be happy and I want things to go smoothly for me and it doesn't matter if that means I am standing outside handing out programs or in the front of the church besides her. Where ever she needs me that is where I will be. I am not some sort of hero because in all honesty I am kind of secretly thrilled. It's like the understudy who worked their butt off and then the lead gets hurt and the spotlight is now yours. In my SIL's defense if I was in her situation I probably would have done the same thing. I am sure that she and her future husband were going to have 6 bridesmaids I would have been next in line (shh, just let me go with this) and now here it is. The wedding is saved and everything is as it should be. (Bret said...see I knew everything would work out the way is was supposed to.)

Then I saw the "Dress" that I am supposed to wear and I started to panic. I have to say that I have been slacking in the slightest in the exercise and diet area and it was kind of nice to not have to worry about looking like the skinny hot college students that will be standing next to me. So I ran 3 miles last night and have started a major low carb, low cal diet, and started looking at tanning places for a good deal. I will keep you posted on the progress (or lack there of as I start to panic).

3.10.2009

Totally Awkward Tuesdays- Pee Triolgy Part 2

As always to participate check out Tova's site.

The apartment I lived in during college was what they call a jack in the box apartment. (I have no idea why). The main room had the living room and an eat in kitchen. Then on either side of the apartment there are two bedrooms and a bathroom. Because of how the weird way the rooms were laid out one of the bedrooms on each side had their closet outside of their room next to the bathroom.

As I mentioned before my roommates had a variety of over night guests and things sometimes got a little crazy at our place. One morning (it was REALLY early like before 6 am. Everyone in the apartment was awoken to one of our roommates YELLING at a guy. The poor guy was standing in the living room and it was obvious that he had had a ROUGH night. We (wandering out in our PJ's) had no idea what the hell was going and were a little annoyed that we had been woken up so early in the morning.

It didn't take but a moment for our roommate to realize that we were all staring at her trying to figure out what the hell happened.

Roommate- "This drunk asshole pissed the bed"

Drunk- hangs his head

Roommate- "Dumb ass shows up and wakes me up wanting to stay over, I let him and what does he do? Piss the F#$@%*# bed. One minute I am asleep and the next I wake up to a warm wet bed."

We all stare at the two of them not sure what to say or do but are trying desperately not to laugh.

Roommate- "But that is not the worst of it."

?!?!

Roommate- "This jackass gets lost on the way to the bathroom and wanders into my closet and PISSES on my clean clothes. There are piles of dirty clothes EVERYWHERE but of course he decides that the best place to piss would be on the entire laundry hamper of folded clean clothes."

Ok so all of us agree that that totally sucks. We were poor lazy college students that rarely did laundry. To have finished a couple of weeks worth of laundry and then have someone piss all over it is unforgivable. However, we felt kind of bad for the guy who was totally humiliated not sure what he should do. So roommate finished chewing the guy out and then he left. We all thought it was kind of funny that this happened to said roommate because she has some serious bitchy attitude going on. As she scrubbed her mattress and started laundry all over again (because drunk piss has a very distinct smell that was permeating our apartment) we laughed to ourselves, felt just a smidge sorry for the dude that we never saw again, and went back to bed.

3.09.2009

The Rumor Mill

This weekend I took the kids and waited in a ridiculously long line to get my PA drivers license. Yes, I have lived her for almost two years and still had my KS drivers license. I also know that this is totally totally wrong but here in PA you have to have a ton of documentation to get it and it took me a while to get everything gathered together. (You know your not in KS anymore when you need your current drivers license, birth certificate, social security card, marriage certificate, two proofs of address, and current insurance card to get a drivers license...in KS you only need your current drivers license and proof of address).




So as the children and I (yes I had to take them b/c Bret was working) were standing in this incredible line I saw a familiar face.

Ok first off I know I couldn't believe it either when I took out my blackberry and pretended to check my email and kind of hid it behind Emily's head who was standing in front of me on the stroller and second off I thought about zooming in for a second shot but even I have a little smidge of decency left.

I happen to live in the same town as the Gosselin family. In fact the new $1.4 million dollar home they moved into recently? It was sold to TLC from my OB/GYN and I have been in it before they moved into it. Kate actually used to work as a labor and delivery nurse at the same hospital that Bret works in. That said it is kind of sad to say that people around here don't like her at all for the most part. Something about the other side of the story that know one really knows. The "people" that she talks about as wanting to "reduce" the number of implants are actually really good doctors that I personally know and that is not exactly how they remember the conversations going either. Something about taking medication in ways she was advised not to and so on. I don't know the whole story and have heard only bits and pieces of it all. I have heard some really sad stories about the efforts that people she worked with had put forth when they were asking for help and being turned down because things weren't new or matching (sound familiar...her dad's church maybe?).

The most recent has been about Jon and his less than upstanding outings while at some of the local bars. The truth is I don't know the whole story. I have heard (from some of the nurses) everything from they are getting a divorce and he has been messing around to he went out and just had a couple of drinks and posed for some pictures. Either way I feel sorry for them all. Marriage and raising kids is hard work. I cringe at the thought of letting a national TV audience into that private circle no matter how much they pay me. I know that I can be super bitchy and I have my days and to the outside world that could perceived in a thousand different ways. At the end of the day they are parents to some really great kids and for THEIR sake I hope that they find away to fight for their marriage. I worry about their ability to sustain their current life style. What happens when the kids decide they want their life back and that they are done having no privacy what so ever?

I am always interested to see what other people think. I know that before I moved here my perspective was totally different. If you are interested in learning more about "the other side" of the story check out Gosslins Without Pity. They do a good job of focusing their concern on the well being of the kids while dispelling the idea that they are something more than what they really are. I also applaud them for staying out of the rumor mill when it comes to Jon's fidelity.

3.04.2009

My First Interview

A friend of mine did this on her facebook and it cracked me up. Here is an interview with my 4 year old daughter Emily Grace Heskett.

1. What is something mom always says to you? Don’t touch anything that is yours.

2. What makes mom happy? When I'm being good.

3. What makes mom sad? When I’m bad.

4. How does your mom make you laugh? Tickle me and I snart when I laugh.

5. What was your mom like as a child? I don’t know.

6. How old is your mom? UMMMMMMMMMM....I don’t know.....39 or 18??

7. How tall is your mom? Um...like 40 feet..no 100 feet

8. What is her favorite thing to do? Take a nap.

9. What does your mom do when you're not around? Do something that she wants to do like watching her shows.

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for? I don’t know like your birthday or flowers or a ring.

11. What is your mom really good at? Cutting strawberries. (huh?)

12. What is your mom not very good at? Hanging up pictures. (can we say random but she's right)

13. What does your mom do for her job? Makes money to help people go to school. (I'm impressed)

14. What is your mom's favorite food? Lita’s food (Lita is my mom so I think she is saying Colombian food)

15. What makes you proud of your mom? When you do what I want to do.

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? Sponge Bob Square pants (really?)

17. What do you and your mom do together? Watch a movie.

18. How are you and your mom the same? Nothing, I’m not wearing any rings, we don’t have the same hair, I don’t have a squishy tummy, we are not the same. (sniffle)

19. How are you and your mom different? I don’t know (see above)

20. How do you know your mom loves you? Because you love me. I’m just magical and four years old so I'm smart and I just know.

21. What does your mom like most about your dad? He likes what you like and he knows what you want. (couldn't have said it better myself)

22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go? On the Border

What's For Dinner?


I have to say that this whole getting up earlier for Lent thing has actually been working pretty well. I am going to bed a little earlier at night but I am starting to get used to it and the benefits are totally worth it. Our mornings are still a little crazy but for the most part we are getting out the door without having to rush around and that has kept the tantrums at bay for the most part.

I am also thrilled that Bret has been home at a somewhat decent time lately which means that he gets to start helping cook dinner. Last month he was on a days rotation (aka get home close to 8pm), the month before that it was nights (have to be at work at 7pm), and the month before that was the holidays thus crazy hell weeks. So needless to say that other than a couple of not so busy weekends he has totally (understandably) been slacking in the dinner department. So he has some ground to make up for and I plan to take advantage. Don't be confused...Bret is not master chef (by any means) BUT the man can grill/smoke a steak/pork chop/loin/chicken/braut/hamburger/vegetables/etc/etc so good it would make you weep.

So tonight we are having one our favorites to celebrate his return to the grill that has been much neglected lately...Made in the Shade pork chops. Since I had lots of time this morning I got the chops set up to marinate for the day. This is an old family recipe that his family has been using for years. I have no idea where it came from since I got it from his mom. Enjoy!

Made in the Shade Pork Chops

1 12 oz can of concentrate Lemonade
2/3 c low sodium Soy sauce
1 tsp celery salt
1/4 tsp garlic powder
2 tsp season salt
4-6 thick cut pork chops

Mix marinade and pour over chops. Let set for 12-24 hours in the refrigerator. Grill chops and enjoy!

*We have also used pink lemonade and limeade and it all tastes great. Tonight we are also having grill asparagus and ranch potatoes (boil red potatoes, cut into fours, add ranch dressing, bacon bits, green onions, and 1/2c shredded cheese and stir till well coated and mixed).

3.03.2009

Totally Awkward Tuesdays- Beginning of the Pee Trilogy

To participate check out Tova's site.

My first year of college I lived in an apartment with three girls. We all smoked, drank a lot of beer, dated a lot of guys, played a lot of Pitch, and had a lot of parties.

During one particular party my sister and her friend had come to visit and were staying in my room and I was on the couch for the night after everyone had left and most people had passed out. It was a long night of drinking and the memories are a little bit cloudy but I think my other roommate was on the couch also (although why that is beats the hell out of me). Anyhoo during the wee hours of the morning I was awoken by a guy stumbling out into the living room who was obviously still really drunk. Not sure what exactly he was doing I tried to go back to sleep. It took me a moment in my still feeling drunk/hung over haziness for me to realize that he was standing in the middle of the living room and was undoing his pants. The next thing I know he is pissing on our living room floor. I am yelling by this point but the guy is totally confused and has no idea where he is. The dude then preceded to leave and we had no idea who he was.

UNTIL a couple of nights later when some friends showed up and other roommate and I totally recognized him. Believe me after cleaning up someone else's piss you never forget a face. My roommate called him out in front of all his friends.

Roommate: "dude, you're the guy who totally pissed on our floor the other night"

Dude: "Hehe, yeah I was pretty drunk"

Roommate: "No seriously dude you pissed all over our floor and then left. I had to clean up your piss"

Dude: "Hehe (nervous and uncomfortable as we all sat and stared not sure what to say) yeah, sorry about that"

Roommate: "Sorry man but you have got to go"

Dude: "Huh?"

Roommate: "You need to leave, you are not welcome here"

Dude: Awkward pause to see if she was serious

Roommate: "OUT"

So he left and the really awkward moment came when the rest of the group had to decide who was going to leave with him and who was going to stay. Most stayed because we were cool like that.

Sadly to say that is only one of three unforgettably awkward moments I had in college involving someone else peeing where they were totally not supposed to because they were drunk. This was the least funny of the three so stay tuned to next week for the second part of the Pee Trilogy.

And the Little One Said "Roll Over"

My conversation with Emily last night at bedtime:

Emily: Mommy I don't want to go to bed. What if I have a bad dream?

Me: Em, you will be fine there is nothing to be afraid of. Besides, Palmer will protect you.

Emily: Mommy, can I sleep with you?

Me: NO. But you can crawl down and sleep with Palmer after he falls asleep if you have a bad dream but don't wake him up.

Emily: Mommy, I don't want to sleep with Palmer because he snores.

Me: (stifling my laughter because this is serious talk) Em you don't want to sleep with me then because daddy snores really loud..a lot louder than Palmer.

Emily: (Cracking up hysterically) When Palmer snores in my ear I push him gently and then he rolls over and stops. (Still laughing)

Me: (also cracking up) Huh, that's what I do with daddy too.

The boys have no idea why we are laughing. It's true that girls speak a different language.

3.02.2009

Sprite, Saltines, and Mommy's Love


We had a very long night last night. Emily got up several times and told me that she had a bad dream and didn't feel good. Finally a couple of hours before the alarm went off so did her tummy.

The weather has been not so good here and so I was not that disappointed to have the day to spend with her making her feel better. So far today we have had crackers, Sprite, and lots of TLC. I can tell that Em feels pretty bad because with a whole day of mommy to herself (we took brother to school) all she has wanted to do was lay on the couch and watch movies. So we sit in our comfy stay home clothes and snooze in and out of naps as we watch the princess' we love get the men of their dreams. On the agenda for the afternoon is some finger nail painting (not sure if we will go with pink or purple today), maybe another movie, reading some books, and if we really are feeling better maybe a couple of board games.

When I was a kid my mom made this special soup that is a broth I have never ventured to make and let me lay in bed as long as I wanted to. She would rub my back and make sure that I had everything I needed to get better. Even as a child the one thing that I always kept close to my side were my books. Nothing says get better soon to me then spending the day in the world of someone else as I lose myself in the pages. What did your mom/dad/whoever do to make you feel better when you stayed home sick?