Savoring the Days

Four weeks from tomorrow is our scheduled c-section date.  This is the day that will change our lives once again forever and we finally get to meet the little guy kicking me all the time and keeping my up during the middle of the night.

To say that I have reached the stage of being uncomfortable is an understatement.  However, for the most part things have gone really well and I don't have much to complain about. 

School is off to a great start for both Emily and Palmer.  Logan and I have been savoring the days we have together just him and I.  We have been taking naps together in the afternoon before we pick up the kids.  Yesterday with the haze of sleep in his eyes he whispered to me "mom"..."I luv you".  I love you too Logan.

I was talking to Bret the other day about how much easier it is to run errands and get things done during the day with just Logan.  We laughed because not that long ago we were convinced there was no way we could do anything again with just one baby.  Going anywhere let alone getting anything done seemed like insurmountable task with a baby.  Now we are just thankful when we don't have to take all three (soon to be four) with us to the store...yet we still do when necessary and survive just fine.

I have been trying really hard to spend some one on one time with each of the kids.  Bret has been doing this for a while and it has been something the kids so look forward too.  I feel like often times I get caught up in the daily grind of running kids to and from practice (swimming, cheer, football, and piano), working on homework, reading, practicing the piano, dinner, baths, etc, etc.  Yesterday when I got everyone to the table and sat dinner out I thought just for a second "what if I went for a walk right now?" or "what if I went upstairs now just for 1/2 hour?"  I am tired and at the end of the day I feel like I just want some alone time. 

I have decided to get a babysitter a few more times during the day for the next couple of weeks.  Just to give me some alone time.  Time to get my hair fixed, nails done, shopping errands, and to just be.  Sound selfish?  I think this time will help to recharge me so I can be more present and patient.  Soon a new baby will need me constantly and the needs of my older will not soon lesson either.  In the mean time I plan to savor my days.

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