Jump In

When I was a kid there was nothing we would rather do than jump rope. Didn't matter if it was on the blacktop at recess, in my driveway, or at the Jump Rope for Heart event, we were always jumping rope. One the hardest things was to do double dutch. Remember when two people turned ropes in the opposite direction and your job was to run in and start jumping without getting caught in the ropes. I was a good rope jumper. The hardest part for me was getting up the courage to run in and start jumping. Once I made the decision to go I was fine. Sometimes I would stand there for what seemed like forever swaying to the movement of the ropes waiting for just the right moment to jump in. That is kind of where I am at right now. There is so much to do. SO MUCH! I feel paralyzed and just can't get myself started. There are mounds of paperwork to complete. I need to mail in everything for our taxes, documents for our mortgage application, and some paperwork for my dad. Bret's birthday is Saturday, Palmer's Easter party is next Tuesday, and my mom flies in on Wednesday. Then it's Easter. We have something going on almost every weekend until we move. I feel completely frozen unsure of where to even start. Bret was giving me a hard time the other day wondering where my 20 some odd lists that he assumed I had going with everything we need to do in the next two months. I haven't written even one. I am so worried that I am going to forget something. That some how these twenty plates that I am so carefully spinning are all going to come crashing down on me. My urge is to do nothing but I know better. So I try and focus on the now. I tell myself that today I am going to get laundry done, vacuum, mail in our tax info, and make the copies for the paperwork to send in for our mortgage application. Tomorrow I am going to pick up groceries, one last present for Bret, and mail our mortgage paperwork. If I focus on the things I need to do today and the next few days it helps subside the panic on the overwhelming things that need to still be done. Yesterday I was reading Emily's newsletter and I almost burst into tears because there was a note from the principle as a reminder that if your student was not returning next year there was paperwork in the office that needed to be completed. Add that to canceling our gym membership, shutting down our utilities here, turning them on there, the sale, the movers, graduation, gifts I am making for the graduates, finishing working, etc, etc and my list will be finished in no time. Can't we just skip all of this and head straight to Hawaii?

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