We are taught to forgive and forget. The first part of that has always been easier for me than the latter.
Words are so powerful. They can make or break a person's day. They can make you laugh or make you cry. They create memories in an instance both good and bad.
I will be the first to admit that I have a sharp tongue. It is one of my biggest faults. When I am hurt I can be vicious.
I was on the phone with Bret the other day and he said something that really hurt my feelings. Before he even finished what he was saying he realized how much he just hurt me. Not wanting to fight I hurried off the phone. He called right back and apologized. I said it was fine and changed the subject. It wasn't really fine and he knew that. A few hours later he came home and again the first thing he did was apologize. He admitted that he knew it hurt me and that he was really sorry. This is some what rare for Bret. He doesn't like to admit that he was wrong. Usually when he apologizes he justifies it some how. I'm sorry but...
This time he just said he was sorry and I could see it in his eyes that he meant. We made up and moved on. Sort of.
There isn't anything else that he could say or do to make it better (although flowers always help). I don't want to bring it up again because there isn't anything else either of us could say that makes it better. I need to just let it go. I have forgiven him but I haven't forgotten and that is where I usually find myself.
Even the next day when I was irritated about something else, I barely caught myself from throwing a snide comment about the previous fight into the mix. I want to let it go. I want it to not bother me anymore. I want to forgive and forget so I just keep working on it. It was a hard reminder that words are powerful.